Hello Europa! After listening patiently the representatives of the 37 candidate countries for Eurovisionhaving seen in rehearsal a dwarf who plays the flute behind the Moldovan candidate, a Danish teenager dressed all in pink, and almost look-alikes of Dua Lipa, Sia and Boy George, the jury of our newspaper awards its points for the edition 2023 which takes place this Saturday, May 13 in Liverpool.
12 points for Sweden
“You’re stuck on me like a tattoo hou hou. Eleven years after her victory at Eurovision with “Euphoria”, which has become a safe bet in nightclubs, Loreen is back! Enclosed in an ultra-sexy high-cut jumpsuit, worthy of the Na’vis of “Avatar”, the 39-year-old Swede clearly did not come to laugh: she is a great favorite for a rare double.
And it’s not because she scares us on stage, locked between two screens, that we give her our 12 points, but because we like her catchy “Tattoo” (hou hou!), which rises crescendo to apotheosis. Pure Swedish Eurodance.
10 points for Finland
Who would have thought that a Finn would teach us how to dance “Cha Cha Cha”? This Saturday, the public of the Liverpool Arena will take in chorus and clapping the refrain of Käärijä. The 29-year-old rapper is the revelation of this 2023 edition, and not just because of his wrestling outfit in apple green leatherette. His “Cha Cha Cha” looks so euphoric that we are afraid to take it.
8 points for (greater) France
The whole week, La Zarra tried (and succeeded!) to sow Le Parisien in the streets of Liverpool. The tricolor delegation has not yet completely digested the media treatment of his defection last minute at a preparatory show in Amsterdam in mid-April. Not resentful, we gladly attribute our third place to him because his ode to “graaaande France” is in his image: whimsical as one might wish. On the sceneshe looks like an Oscar, so we give her our prize.
7 points for Norway
Just recovered from coronation of Charles III, how not to bet on the “Queen Of Kings”? The young Alessandra sings, dances and puts on a show. We do not see the seconds p in this heady and resolutely feminist title. Surely it’s much more invigorating than last week’s ceremony at Westminster Abbey.
6 points for Australia
A little metal in Liverpool should not displease the inhabitants of the city of rock. With the Voyager group, we understand finally why Australia participates in Eurovision ! Their “Promise” invigorates. Standing in his convertible, hair in the wind, the singer takes us back to the cult film “Mad Max”. We only expect one thing: that they smash their guitar to the ground at the end of their show.
5 points for Ukraine
They play with the screens as well as Beyoncé. This year, everyone is seduced by Tvorchi and his “Heart Of Steel”, in line with Woodkid. Hearts embroidered on their t-shirts during the semi-final, the duo talk a lot about the war in Ukraineto whom this 2023 edition is dedicated, and the risks ociated with nuclear weapons.
4 points for Italy
Without transition ! After the coronation of their group Måneskin in 2021, Italy makes a 360 degree turn and reconnects with the ballads of yesteryear. There is Eros Ramazzotti in this 35-year-old singer who is trying his luck again after a 7th place in 2013. When Marco Mengoni sings, it smells of pion, melodrama, summer loves and car radio on the road to vacation.
3 points for Belgium
On the hat side, La Zarra has a lot to worry about. Gustaph is the surprise guest of this final, all in 1990s dance and voguing, this urban dance born in New York gay clubs in the 1970s. Far in the polls, the LGBT cowboy from Belgium touches voters and moves the pit.
2 points for Spain
We wouldn’t have bet a peseta on Blanca Paloma, and her flamenco modernized with Eurovision sauce. And yet, the public loves it. The bettors too, and rank her 7th.
1 point for Austria
Even in a song contest, a little literature doesn’t hurt. Teya and Salena pay a “weird” tribute to Edgar Allan Poe. Not sure that the scenography was directed by American director Tim Burton, a great admirer of the poet-novellist. But he will probably appreciate all that red, which stings the eyes a little while our feet beat time.